The Woes of Love
by haveyounomercy
Summary: Did you really think that all of Haruhi's admirers were boys? HaruhixOC, no, really. Sometimes, the dramatic Kagame Haruko needs a break. And that nice feminine boy is very much the refreshment that she needs.


**A/N Holy wow. When was the last time I wrote something for Ouran? Well, whatever it is, I'm back, after, what, 6 months of other fandoms? Anyways, since I hadn't dipped into this fandom or OCs for so long, please forgive me for any blatant mistakes/errors. This was set in the beginning of the series, I guess a little after Renge was introduced to the Host Club?**

**So. Yeah. I tried to do something more gentle this time.**

**Hah. Please. Anyone who's read anything by me knows 'gentle' isn't in my vocabulary. If anyone even remembers me anymore, that is. =D A few notes about this fic: It is HaruhixOC, because it's so obvious that someone would fall for the little girly man that s/he is. If I'm the only one who thinks this, then so be it. Also, I will refer to Haruhi as a male here.**

**Moving on, I hope you enjoy this… piece of strange work.**

**Disclaimer: Let's be reasonable now, shall we?**

* * *

Chapter 1

At the tender age of 17, Kagame Haruko's life was plucked out of its mundane bore and thrown into a deep, dark pit of nothingness where it spiralled continuously down into the fires of hell.

In short, she had fallen in love.

Now, this wouldn't have been so bad, really, if she hadn't been such a drama queen. But, such is the life that she was forced to live.

"Father," She proclaimed with an air of despair at the breakfast table one morning. "Father, tragedy has befallen me."

Her father looked up from his imported Alaskan cereal with a raised eyebrow. "What is it, darling?"

Haruko put a hand up to her forehead in an exaggerated pose. "This tragedy, it is so painful. The heart wants what it wants, but the mind will not succumb to its pleas. What has become of me, and this sad world that we live in? It is so cruel, dear father, so cruel."

For the hundredth time, Kagame Ichirou put his head in his hands, sighed, and damned that stupid maid who had introduced his daughter to Shakespeare.

"Do you see my body? All my friends envy me because I am so skinny, but it is not something to be proud of. I am this skinny because I am famished. And not from food, no, --by the way, father, I really enjoy this cereal today, where's it from?-- I am famished from life. Life does not give me the nutrients I need to survive. The nourishment that life provides for others… I am lacking it. Oh, father, this is such a tragedy." Haruko continued on her woeful monologue.

As calmly as he could, Ichirou nodded to the maid standing beside him who also had a pained expression on her face. She carefully took his finished bowl away and replaced it with a newspaper. Ichirou then started reading the newspaper, 'hmm'-ing every once in a while to show that he was still listening to his daughter.

"Why? Why is it that I am so rich, but so poor at the same time? Why is it that no one can and will ever be able to answer my --why thank you Shina-san, how did you know I wanted more sugar in my cereal? You are the world's most wonderful maid, thank you-- questions? All I ask for is some answers, why can no one give me those? You must know, father, that I am terribly pleased with what you have given me so far, but it is my sorrow that I am always wanting more. Perhaps I am greedy for knowledge, but that makes me sound like such a terrible prat. I'm not a terrible prat, am I, father?"

Ichirou made a noise that meant 'eat your cereal, darling'.

Haruko took it as a 'no'.

"I'm glad you think so. At least one of us is sane around here. Yes, I do believe that I have gone slightly round the bend, especially after my latest discovery. It's become somewhat of a hobby of mine now to visit this 'club' after school --now now, Shina-san, please do not look so shocked, I mean a 'club' as in an extracurricular activity club at our school-- and it's surprisingly enjoyable. The Host Club, they call it. --Shina-san? Are you okay? You don't look so well-- And this is where tragedy has come and struck me down like a bolt of lightning from the hands of God himself." She paused, looking at her father.

"You're going to be late if you don't finish your breakfast soon, my dear." Her father was in the middle of reading an important article about the otters in North America.

Haruko, indignant, stood up from her seat (after finished her cereal, of course) and walked over to her father's chair. Her back straight, she stared down through brown (she preferred to call them 'hazel') eyes at her ignorant father.

"Father, I've fallen in love." No reaction. "With a first-year."

The maids all gasped in demure shock, and the head maid Shina sensed a migraine coming. It was the first time the young lady had ever expressed interest in a boy her age (she had been quite infatuated with Shakespeare, Hemingway and Dickens, all at separate time in her childhood). The news had already traveled to the kitchens, and several loud crashes were heard.

This was a matter of utmost importance. Shina had to get going right away. She stared, with everyone else in the room, at the master of the house, Kagame Ichirou, awaiting his orders.

Slowly, the newspaper's edge inched down to reveal two slightly darker than his daughter's brown eyes. They showed no irregular emotions.

Finally, he spoke.

"Give my regards to the poor boy."

* * *

It had started out as just an innocent exploration. Haruko, whom was not a believer in the saying _curiosity killed the cat_, was strolling down the hallways just a few minutes before school ended. She had a study break last period, and she was just coming back from the washroom when the bell rang.

Coincidently, she just so happened to be walking in the hallway most accessible to the stairs when, like someone had pulled a switch on all the doors or something, every single classroom door slammed open and more girls than she could count raged towards her, screaming.

At the end of it, poor Haruko found herself pushed backwards _along with the crowd_ as what seemed to be the entire female population of Ouran Academy stormed through the dense hallway.

She didn't even want to know how she managed to get up all those stairs.

At the end of it, however, she found herself face to face with a rather large wall.

"Hn." Said the wall.

Haruko opened her mouth to apologize to the wall-turned-human but she was cut off as another swarm of girls pushed her to the side, making her knock into another wall.

Thankfully, this one was made out of plaster.

So she stayed there, lying against that wall in what looked like fear, until the crowd seemed to thin and the girls who used to be foaming at their mouths transformed into polite, smiling young ladies.

Haruko wasn't sure what strange land she had been caught in, but she knew she wanted to be out of it as soon as possible.

"Haruko-senpai?"

Apparently, life was not as easy as she wished.

"Yes?" She turned to her left to look down (she was rather tall, especially for girls at her age) at the person next to her.

"Oh, so it is you!" The girl smiled, her face emitting sunshine and rainbows and the like.

Casually moving strands of her messy black hair back into her ponytail, Haruko nodded. It was that girl from her drama club, what was her name? Kimiko?

"I didn't know you were into this kind of stuff, Haruko-senpai." Kimiko looked away from her senpai to glance across the room, now just lightly buzzing with chatter.

"Life has brought me here, and so I shall be here." Haruko nodded to no one in particular.

Giggling, Kimiko smiled, once again blinding the older girl with her smile of rainbows and unicorns. "Well, I hope you have a good time."

"I hope to have a good time too, but only if I'm destined to have a good time will I have a good time. Ah, but I am just a pawn in the game of life, and it is so sad, for it is not I who moves, but it is life who moves me." Haruko sighed, effectively bringing down Kimiko's smile a few notches.

"That's all in how you see it, princess." A rather smooth sounding voice replied from her right. Turning to see a bespectacled boy holding a clipboard, Haruko widened her eyes in recognition.

"Ootori-san?" He nodded. "What a pleasure it is to meet you again. I didn't know you were a part of this big…" She paused, not knowing the right word.

"It's called a Host Club." He supplied, nudging his glasses upward. They were about the same height, with Kyouya just being a few centimetres taller than his classmate.

"A host club." Haruko was about to launch into a very dramatic discussion about how wrong she thought this all was until she heard a slight giggling.

A quiet, non-stop giggling from her left.

"Kimiko-hime? Is there something wrong?" Kyouya politely asked.

Kimiko just blushed.

"This world… it despairs me." Haruko closed her eyes and willed it all to go away.

It didn't.

"You know, I think there's someone over there who you might want to meet. He shares a lot of your opinions." Kyouya hid a smile as he gestured to the newest Host to their collection.

"That smartly dressed boy over there?" Haruko squinted. "Why, he looks so very young. Are you sure he's meant to be here?"

"He's a first-year, just like Kimiko-hime." Kyouya assured, making Kimiko giggle again.

"Are you sure? He looks, well, I don't think it'd be very polite to express how old I think he looks out loud."

Kyouya, glasses glinting, gestured to another Host. "Well, that one is a third-year."

Haruko out a hand to her cheek and shook her head, murmuring, "Dear Lord, my eyes are deceiving me."

* * *

Knowing that this day could not get any weirder, Haruko started making her way to the smartly-dressed boy's table.

"Hello, my name is Fujioka Haruhi. How may I be of service to you today, princess?" He looked up as she sat down in an empty seat. He hadn't gotten many customers that day, but if he could entice a newcomer…

"The first thing you could do is stop calling me princess, my dear Fujioka-san. My name is Kagame Haruko, and that is what I like to be called by." She extended her hand for a handshake.

Haruhi wondered vaguely if this is what making a business deal was like while he shook her hand. "Then, Kagame-san, you must call me Haruhi." He made an effort to smile.

Haruko smiled back lightly, letting go of the Host's hand. Everything about him seemed… somewhat feminine, really. It was almost charming how much of a girl he looked to be.

"Haruhi-kun it is, then." She nodded briskly. "Now, tell me, what has life brought upon you these days?"

Haruhi, a bit at loss for what to do with this eccentric character, just smiled again. He felt that smiling was always a good move.

"Kagame-san, I think you've got some of your facts wrong." He kept on smiling gently as he put his elbows on the table and cradled his chin in his hands. "It's you who should tell me how you are doing, not the other way around."

Haruko leaned back in what could only be described as shock. No one ever asked her how she was feeling out of their own accord. Well, this was certainly an experience!

"Well then. These days, life has become a bit of a chore for me. Wake up, go to school, get back, do homework, sleep. Nothing interesting happens to me anymore. Why, the most exciting thing that has happened to me in this past week was a surprise quiz in science. Life shouldn't be so boring, so dull. Shouldn't it be full of adventure, full of excitement, Haruhi-kun?"

Haruhi tilted his head slightly to the right. "Well, I like to think every day as a new beginning. Maybe if you look past the everyday occurrences and into the details you'll find something interesting that you didn't see before. After all, isn't life just a big excitement in itself?" He smiled, thinking of the Host Club and its strange antics.

Haruko unconsciously put a hand to her heart. It was beating. It felt like a strange, foreign sound to her. Too long, she had not heard it drum in her ears. Too long, she had not felt it beat in its cage. Too long had she not… lived. Loved. Enjoyed.

Her face softened for a moment as she carefully drank in the features of the person in front of her. How had she not noticed those soft, brown eyes that were so kind and full of care? How had she not noticed the soft way those eyes curved when she smiled? It was true. She had broken the barrier between living, and life. She had seen the details.

Haruko felt… alive.

"Haruhi-kun, do you write poems?" She asked nervously.

Haruhi, remembering an assignment he had to complete the other day in English, nodded. "Sometimes."

Done deal.

Kagame Haruko was officially head over heels.


End file.
